Top tweets today from the Funny channel
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One of my ANCIENT headshots spotted in a Kentucky comedy club!
Hi. I have three updates for you.
1. Today I turned 40.
2. Last week my wife gave birth to our son. His name is Theo. He's adorable.
3. I am now unsure what to do about my backlog of comics that depict babies as diarrhea-pumping hobgoblins.
Thanks everybody for going to see Donāt Worry Darling in theaters! I had a really amazing time making this film and Iām very proud to be a part of it. @dontworrydarlin
Life is 10% of what happened to you, is 90% what you do about it.
My weekend plans
You are horrifying to look at. But that's a good thing.
I love him. The truth is actually simple and we can all agree on it
āwyd tonight?ā
itās 5pm, iāve already showered and gotten into bed. if u wanted to make plans, u shouldāve asked 3 months ago
Iām, Sean? Yeahā¦ this, uh, actually makes him look awesome? Maybe delete this?
brushy brushy
š¹ _unn1mm3 | IG
How does he say these words and not think āoh shit Iām human garbageā?
Elliot (Stabler) is 5 years old today. After his birthday treats, he will return to his job at the Special Victims Unit.
A lot of people ask me about the choice to cast all LGBTQ+ actors for āBrosā and this is why we made that decision. Thank you @CBSSunday- what an honor to be on this show!
I never really talk about stuff like this... my father was a hoodlum and had illegal dealings with Don King. I used to run numbers...
Happy birthday to @MattOswaltVA ā the best little brother, Emmys date & uncle on the planet!
Super annoyingšŖ°
š¹ @ketnipz
I knew that if I continued with standup I would lose my career... Cancel culture is real.
āAvengers Assemble!ā
Some people still think introverts are shy and cannot make friends. We're not shy and we make friends.
It's just our energy gets drained from multiple long interactions with people and we need time for ourselves to re-energize.
See you in an hour. #BenSchwartzAndFriends
It sounds like The Weekend. Did Eddie Murphy invent The Weekend sound?
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astrophysicist
My name is Kevin Hart and I WORK HARD!!! That pretty much sums me up!!! Everybody Wants To Be Famous But Nobody Wants To Do The Work
The voice of the people. Sorry, people.
not a doctor
Evieās husband
The ONLY official social media account for Actor Author and Artist Jim Carrey!
Building @MEMELAND one meme at a time ā¢ š§ [email protected] ā¢ CEO ā”ļø @9gagceo
The Official Twitter Page of Seth MacFarlane - āThe Orville: New Horizonsā coming to Hulu June 2, 2022!
We love to make you laugh.
we're on a planet in outer space. (((she/her)))
new money
Now touring - on and off - with Marty Short.
Thoughts from the shower. Usually taken from /r/showerthoughts. #parody Contact: [email protected] or on Insta-iamkritverma / DM's OPEN
Sorry, I canāt go out! Iām busy laying in my bed with my phone š Follow me if youāre an introvert š (Memes Parody Account) Business DM me āļø
You know... the weird one.
In 2022: new @Netflix special WE ALL SCREAM out Tuesday, September 20th! MINOR THREATS from @DarkHorse out now! I like making stuff. IG: pattonoswalt
Just another luminous spiritual being having a beautiful and difficult human experience.
Global philanthropists, investor and award winning entertainer. āThe more people you help become successful the more successful you become. ā
Is This Anything? On Sale Now
Chronicling your wild lives, one text at a time ā¢ā¢ā¢ Email [email protected] for rates / collab / whatevah
Male Model. COMEDY MONSTER on Netflix. Touring with all new material on THE FUN TOUR. My first wife is @jeanniegaffigan.
Humor Tailored for Men. Submit: [email protected] IG: https://t.co/gLpO60o1D1
This is the real, official David Spade. Any other accounts are fake.
KING OF POP CULTURE, Founder of @DTPfoundation, 2x Peopleās Choice Award Winner šPlays Monchi in @mitchellsmovie! New book out this Fall.
Star/co-writer of the new comedy BROS! Only in THEATERS Sept 30! BUY YOUR TICKETS RIGHT NOW: https://t.co/h7dqCI7q1p
